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seeing different

1/27/2018

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Wow. January is almost over already. 
I still need to do a bunch of things before the busy-ness of Spring and Summer take over my life!  I better pick up the pace. :) 
I've been somewhat obsessed with my Window Project which I've named 'Seeing Different'. It's hard to describe how much I LOVE this project. I've always wanted to paint on a wall. Paint large. It began as a (totally) different kind of Christmas tree.
I wanted to do ornaments on the wall. without an actual tree.. Lucky for me, Gregg accommodates my artistic endeavors (he's an enabler!:) He bought an 8 foot piece of underlayment at Home Depot and hung it up for me. I then painted it white. Decorating my tree was an utmost pleasure. Many years it is sort of a chore...mostly a chore... I realized this year that I desperately needed the challenge of something inspirational and innovative.  I LOVED IT.  
I was already thinking about what I would do after the tree came down.
I knew I wanted a window surrounded by bricks.
The bricks are just wonderful, they are photographs (all taken with cameras, dare I say, I never dreamed I'd have a phone that took great pix....)  They all have something to do with how we see. perception. actual sight and not actual sight. some are double exposures, some are blurry. some are heart-wrenching. some are hilarious. some are stupid. some are nostalgic. some are gorgeous. some are thought provoking. All are snapshots of life, moments in time. Similar to decorating The Tree, doing the bricks was so exciting and inspirational. Placing them and installing them in the distinct way I wanted them. I LOVED IT.
The window is now being developed. Im painting it slowly, changing things as they come. I really love the idea of seeing different ( both an adjective and a noun.) 
I will keep you all updated.Stay tuned. Thank you for caring.
I LOVE  IT.

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Looking for love

1/17/2018

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Social media plights and pleasures. I'm sure glad my own kids weren't born on social media. This is something I've thought about (and probably said) a few times. Meaning that when they were little, I didn't have such things as social media sights to post pics of their (extremely adorable and worthy) everyday antics. Please don't think I'm judging you moms and dads of adorable littles... I'm not.  It's just that, well, I think something is lost in the process. I love taking pictures. I love art. I love beauty and see it constantly. But when my own thoughts are 'what a perfect instagram post! gotta get this shot cuz I already have a cute and relatable quote/post to go with this'....rather than 'what a beauty. I wanna remember this perfect thing', well.... something is lost.  For me.
Of course, I DO love Instagram because I can see so much ART and plants and books and so much incredible photography. But I don't love many other social sites these days.
We all know what 'stories' are, right? Those fairly common snippets of pics and videos proclaiming the fabulous moments we are in right now.? I recently spent some time with my youngest, and I realized that I deplore his 'stories' mostly. (sorry youngest)
Let me explain. I dont much care for the LetMeShowYouHowPerfectlyCrazyWonderfulPartyingMyLifeIsDontYouWannaBeMe?
First off, I don't believe most of them anyway. I doubt the reality of these posts. But on the other hand... they are called 'stories'... so I guess another way of seeing it is, It's a story. We have become a nation of storytellers.
When exactly did we decide everyone should know what we are doing and not doing  and wish we were doing anyway?
When did that happen? I guess it was gradual. I see people posting everything from what they eat (obvious one..who hasn't?) to how their life literally sucks today because the dishwasher broke and the dog got out and the kid ate poop etc etc etc. Remember when we had all those experiences and more and didn't (couldnt) tell the social world in pictures and posts? Was it any less meaningful? Or is it actually advantageous to tell others so that we gain some empathy and love? Are we really just looking for love? Are we finding love this way? I have no idea.
​ I also believe the more social media active you are, the less social you become. Ironic, a bit.
In the past year or so, I have realized that scrolling through facebook left me feeling horrible and depressed far more often than it didn't. So I stopped. Mostly. Kinda. The only way to truly stop, I suppose is delete. But I have a business page...and I'm not ready to give that up yet. My goal is to get folks to visit THIS www instead, but this takes time and work on my part, and eventually I will get there. For now I'm looking for barnwords love in all the places.  x
 
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I wrote this last march.  (But today i loved it.)

1/1/2018

2 Comments

 
Day 28 all on a tuesday
sleeping. dozing. waking. drinking water. sweatpants. showering. teethbrushing. pour-over. texting. reading. writing in a journal. planning. checking things. clothing. 
jeans. fave sweatshirt. hat?
clouds. sun. breeze. windchimes. cars going by. someone's dog barking. last years plants that need cutting back. gloves. clippers. glasses. tulips. daffs. allium. and so many things coming out of the ground (super exciting). loving. walking. observing. daydreaming. thinking. worrying. marveling.
coffee. water. chickensalad. radishes. tangerines. half a chocolate cookie. butternut squash. toast.  
driving two different Hondas, the loaner and mine (yay! complete with new wheel bearings and no more weird noises.)
birds. bugs. two cats. one husband and one mother I took to one doctor in one office. one face time with one young kid.
one neighbor walking by with one grandchild who asked one question of me ('can I go in your house?'.... how much do I love that? A LOT but she was quickly scurried away by manner concious neighbor.)
reading. writing. typing. stretching. e-filing (twice because... rejection) talking. searching. hoping. wondering. waiting. e-mailing. straightening up. making appointments. yoga minute. wash dishes. feed cats. pet cats. 
stereo. computer. television. phone. vacuum cleaner. barnwood. lost earring. found bracelet. hair brushing and lamenting. 
open windows. closed windows. laundry. refrigerator clean out. (god I hate wasting food) light candle. enjoy smells. 
muddy boots. favorite shoes. slippers. sox. 
arguing. apologizing. debating. contemplating. chatting. more thinking. conscious breathing. more reading.  
sore backs. advil. write two checks. mail one bill.(yes I still mail one or two bills....but only because it takes a little longer to clear than online...and only one or two anymore... throwbacks are us)
laugh. listen. shake hands. be nice. be sad. be stupid. be friendly. be tired. be thankful. be astounded. be disgusted. be patient. be hungry. be thirsty. be irritated. be happy. be surprised. be helpful. feel lucky. feel unlucky. don't gamble.
check weather in shanghai. check weather in los angeles. experience weather in illinois. wonder about weather this weekend. wonder about weather in general. wonder about this weekend in general. wonder about money. wonder about sales. wonder about work. wonder about them. wonder about us. wonder about this old house. wonder about WAD people. 
write 500 WAD. sick of it. gonna miss it. 
stare at a world map. stare at pictures above computer. stare into space. 
drink beer. drink water. drink tea. drink it all in. 
notice light on trees. notice things. notice oven timer going off. 
hope i don't have heartburn tonight. hope i sleep a nice solid bit tonight. hope kids on spring break are safe tonight. hope hubby feels better tomorrow. hope my kids are happy. hope our world survives this piece of time. hope i wake up feeling great on wednesday. 
x #500wordsaday
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