Day 1. Getting old.
I've been thinking a lot about aging. The aging process. The natural evolution that we all go through. I am 58 years old, and when I was young I thought 58 was pretty damn old. Now I have friends who are in their 60s and they seem as if they're 30. My mum is 90. She says she wants to die and be done with it all. I get that, but of course it's not my call. She's apparently still got some livin' in her because after this last stroke and her current stint in the rehab hospital....she appears stronger than before. I've written about this and other problems related to this recently and frankly, I'm tired of hearing my own thoughts about it. But I will say I hope I live just long enough.
My life is more than half over! I've got to get moving here. I've still got lots to do before the end. When do I think I'm gonna do it?
My kids are grown. My time is now. I still feel pretty young in my head. I wonder how much different I actually am (in my brain) now than I was at 30. I'm smarter... but am I really any different? Think how frustrating it is to be 90 (or whatever) and want to do the same enjoyable things you used to, but your body denies you. A hike, a movie...a dinner in the city, a ballet. A yoga class. A weekend trip to NY. It seems unfair that you would still have the same brain/wants but be in no physical way able to do them. It seems like you should just want to nap or walk a few feet to the mailbox...perhaps read a large-print book. Because you could do those things. But life can be cruel. And so I am consciously making the effort to not put off the things I want to do. At 58 (and young! At heart!) I can do most anything I want. Tomorrow I am flying to L.A. to visit my youngest. It was a spontaneous decision born of a text from him a month ago, saying he missed me and wished I was there. I only have a couple days...but who cares? Adventure is my drug of choice these days. The snow is flurrying in cold gray illinois and its been a particularly difficult February. And I'm sure not getting any younger.
As for 500 words a day, I am surprised that I am doing this go round with the challenge. I will be irritated if I don't finish it ... I have enjoyed it in the past though. Like Kirk, I have never regretted writing. But I may limit my expectations to 15 days this time with the option to add the remaining 15 if possible. Giving myself a little out, there. x #500wordsaday