...Insomnia. such an uncomfortable condition, at least for me. I've struggled with lack of good sleep for so many years, I don't remember if I ever was a good sleeper. This writing group is not helping...I lay awake pondering things I've read in here and think about whatever that makes me think about in turn, for hours. Well,last night anyway. But don't feel guilty, fine writers, I have plenty to occupy my weary brain without you. The problem is I fall asleep just about an hour before I should get up when this happens. So obviously I feel crappy and lethargic and out of sorts. (again). Coffee is fabulous though, and so is sunlight.
I do wonder though,why I cannot turn off my thoughts. In the Spring, when I go back to regular work and I'm fairly exhausted at night, I do sleep better. If I have to catch a plane or go somewhere I havent been before, I can guarantee a fairly sleepless night prior. I wouldn't call myself a nervous person, ironically...just too full of thoughts. My proverbial cup runneth over. and over. and over. Sleep is so precious, such a wonderful thing when it happens. I really love it... and I love my bed.
Lately, I've taken to just letting thoughts be instead of trying, consciously to "go to sleep". ME:go to sleep, dammit. its 2:34 and I'm tired and what the hell is wrong with me anyway?? MY BRAIN: why does my wrist hurt so much now? Do I have the dreaded carpal tunnel syndrome? I wonder why G is still up, its so late...what the heck is he doing?how cool to talk to randy today...poor old dog out in the cold,who does that?what are these people really like that write these brilliant compositions?hope Ian is alright always thinking about his well being.do people still play checkers?remember that one time at the pool?now my shoulder hurts,wtf. I hate being old. but not old like grandma but still.wouldnt it be cool to get that job,that lauren talked about at yoga?but i could really make a mess of writing words on a wall couldn't I? ugggg.tomorrow will be fun but i don't have a project to bring(loser) not really but those guys all do lap sized art and I don't.still. seeing those girls will be great.hope i wake up on time.Twas nice to be invited to play ladies pool but i actually don't want to make the effort and don't much care for pool anyway and i hope they don't think less of me but i don't even know most of them anyway so do I care and im seriously trying not to care what people think of me but I still do care.(INSERT RANDOM THOUGHTS ABOUT A BOOK IM READING).... And so on and so on and so on. You get the idea.
So how do you guys deal with insomnia? Throw out some ideas, I would love to hear them. x #500wordsaday